It's not all doom and gloom around here

Today my mood was a bit more level.  It is getting more steady with time. 

My husband and I went to see our counselor today. I would highly recommend to anyone experiencing a life-altering loss like this to seek counseling. We found someone who specializes in fertility and reproductive issues. It seems like it is just nice to hear a professional say that it is ok for you to cry and that you need to take care of yourself. I would also strongly advocate that you and your partner go together, as this way everything is said in each other's presence. Too many partnerships break up over things like this. However, if your partner has dug their heels in, go for yourself. 

My husband and I are doing ok. We are sad. We are humorous. We miss our baby. We love each other. Our hearts are broken. Our hearts are swollen with love for our baby. We have found that our relationship is solid. That is a great comfort. 

Yesterday, my colleague at work told me a very touching thing that she did.  She lost her husband unexpectedly several years ago, while their children were quite young.  She told me she traditionally writes the names of loved ones that have passed away in the sand whenever she goes to a beach. While she and her boys were on spring break last week, she wrote her husband's name and our baby's name all over the beach! I couldn't believe she would write our Serenity's name along with her husband's! It was such a nice way to honor Serenity and our great loss. It is these little things that people do, that just seem right to them at the time, that make a huge difference for these grieving parents.